Talk to a sex therapist online
I don't want them to try anything sexual yet - they need to re-establish their intimacy first.Barbara admits she likes John stroking her hand and that the skin-on-skin contact was reassuring.
Silly, fun things to make them feel relaxed and intimate, without the pressure of full sex. I see so many couples who say they have 'gone off' sex.Yet there's a complete absence of affectionate body language or mutual touching. This is their first visit - I always try to see couples together for their 50-minute introductory session. I know that Sam made the initial phone call to us and I wonder if he had to coerce her into coming along. They have been married for four years and are thinking about trying for a baby.Sam glances nervously at his wife, then blurts out: 'We don't make love often enough.' Fiona is bright red. 'Perhaps we don't have sex as much as we used to,' she adds. Both have very busy working lives, earning about the same amount of money and, as they talk more about their daily lives, I am beginning to get the impression Fiona is feeling under pressure.Sam has seemed increasingly agitated and suddenly he says: 'You don't even want to make love to me! 'I don't think you love me any more,' he says, and then looks about to cry. In fact, this is not the case at all, but he cannot see it.I do think their relationship can be saved, but thank goodness they came to see me before real damage was done.